Days like today, when I have had a lot of time for reflection, I feel a pull in my spirit to do more. The need is so great and there are so many kids out there that need to be loved- showered with the love of their Heavenly Father! While I feel confident that I am where the Lord wants me to be right now, I also believe that he is using this time in mighty ways to prepare my heart for what is yet to come.
I sit here in the glow of my Christmas tree and sip a glass of punche (a delightfully warm and delicious Mexican holiday drink) and I am struck by how gentle God is with me! He knows my struggle of a love for creature comforts and he is ever so gently pruning me of the selfish desires of my heart. Even as I sit here in a time of prayer, I am being changed. Strengthened. Prepared. The things of this world are losing their shine and my heart feels like it could burst with joy as my vision becomes free of worldly distractions. As much as I love the soft flicker of a candle and my cozy down comforter and my colorful mixing bowls, I am no longer afraid to live without these kinds of things.
How kind God is to give me this time to learn these lessons before I am living in a situation where creature comforts are not even an option. How kind God is to draw me to him and show me that without the things of this world I still have strength, courage, hope, joy and peace. But that without Him I would have nothing, I would be nothing. Without the things of this world I am still the woman that I was created to be, I still have a purpose, a passion and a calling. Without God I would have nothing. No passion. No purpose greater than myself. No joy. No hope. Praise God for teaching me this! This is one of those lessons that my mind has always known, but my heart has finally understood the depth of meaning behind these words. The song “All in All” has come to my mind…
You were my strength when I was weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
When I am down you pick me up
When I am dry you fill my cup
You are my all in all
Seeking you as a precious jewel
Lord to give up I’d be a fool
You are my ALL IN ALL
I have sung those words hundreds of times and yet today I am struck anew by the meaning of them. These words define me because God defines me. People and things will come and go in my life but that will never chance who God is and who I am in Him!
I came here to try and change the world one orphan at a time and I am the one who is being changed. Praise the Lord!